It's Back

Maybe it was just a hard day, but the loneliness is back. I've been feeling it for a the last week or so, but last night it was really bad. Logically, I'm not alone, but I can't shake the feeling. I've lost who I was.

When I see Sean, I smile, but I don't always feel something. Is this taking longer than normal?

Let it be known!

At 11.5 weeks, Sean started teething. I'm not mentally ready for this, but hopefully everyone gets through it pain free ;)

Starting to come around

I'm finally starting to feel some love. Within in the last week or so was the first time I told him I loved him.
I think it's becoming easier as he develops..becomes more of a person. I can start to see him develop skills now.

i feel lucky to have him in my life..and not just him as a baby, but Sean, specifically. I don't think i would be able to imagine a better son.

Dear Future Self

Things to consider if you decide you're ready for #2:

• The first two weeks with an infant are nearly hell. It does get better after that, but it's still not easy...far from it.
• Being pregnant sucks, it's a long lonely year, and at this point you have no idea how you can physically handle a toddler while being pregnant.
• Birth, that was the easy part - but it might not go as smoothly the second time.
• Little babies are cute, but only when they are quite and you are rested.
• Your baby is 5 weeks old and though you have a motherly instinct to care for him, you don't feel an overwhelming love or like a mom. Hopefully by the time you read this again, that will have changed.
• If you do get pregnant, be sure to have more fun on maternity leave.

Birth Story - Sean

Labor and Birth
So, thursday night (10/3) was like any, recent, typical thursday night. Dan went out to play horseshoes and I stayed home and watched stand-up comedy (but this time in the dark and w/out my computer on). Dan came home a little early and watched TV with me and passed out on the couch. I ended my show before it was done and we went to bed maybe by 11pm.

I got up around 2:30am for the usual pee break and things were normal. However, maybe about a 1/2 hour or so from there I woke up with some bad cramps. I guess they were actually contractions, but the pain was almost exclusively in my lower back and I thought I would feel them over the top of my uterus and have them move down (like the "wave" everyone keeps talking about). I gave it about a 1/2 hour before I decided to start timing them. The contractions where of irregular length but were pretty consistently 3-4 min apart. I didn't think this was real, as my birthing classes told me that they should start out anywhere from 5-30 min apart..and get stronger with each one - mine were also varying in strength. I got dan up just to let him know what was going on but that he can go back to sleep. Around 5:30 I texted my midwife and she told me to take a shower and try to sleep. Well, I took the shower but sleep didn't happen. Laying down made the contractions way more painful.

Little did I know at the time, around 6:30/7:00am I started the transition phase - denoted by the vomiting. By this time, Dan was up with me and we were all sitting in the bathroom (Mr. T included). My midwife wanted me to eat something b/c she knew I wouldn't be able to later...well, I wasn't able to at that point. Dan had tried making me some oatmeal and toast.

I tried to calm things down with a heating pad on me and I moved to our loveseat out in the living room. At that point I told dan to call our doula so she could help me labor, but that somehow got lost in translation and she didn't get called. I was ready to leave for the birth center, but since it was a friday morning were would be in the middle of rush hour, so we decided to wait a bit longer. Dan grabbed up the last few things that we needed. I told him to brush his teeth too...he asked if he could take a shower and I reluctantly said sure, but that it better not be more than 2min. Well, he was gone in less time than that I started WAILING b/c the involuntary pushing phase had started. The noises I was making scared Dan and Mr T!

At that point I really didn't think I would make it to the center and I certainly didn't want to sit in the car. So, I called my midwife around 9:50am with the intent of having her come to the house, but I was never able to speak that much. By then, Dan had ran out of the bathroom and saw I was on the phone and all I could hear was my midwife screaming on the other end (to Dan), Get Her Here Now!

Reluctantly again, I got in the car and we sped off...with my literally grabbing the oh-shit handle the entire way.

Everyone at the center was calm when I got there and had the room nice and ready. My midwife asked me if I wanted a waterbith and I still didn't know, but she suggested it so I got in. It was so nice! The water was warm, I was buoyant, and she had dried herbs and aromatherapy oils in the tub which was so pleasant. The room was dark too except for the twinkle lights above the tub.

I was pushing while on my knees in the beginning and sometime during that point, mom and dad arrived and said (after the fact) that they could hear me from the waiting room. Also, not long after I arrived (about 20 min later), LaNette started to suspect the baby was breech (p.s. he wasn't at our exam just 3 days earlier). 1) b/c they were scooping out a lot of poop from the tub and started to noticed that it looked like baby poop. 2) she asked me to reach up and let her know if I could feel the head - and I told her I don't think so, I feel something squishy. She wanted me to get out of the tub and have an exam. The was very crappy!!! Well, she confirmed her recent suspicion that he was breach and things suddenly took a slight turn.

My Midwife and her assistant remained calm, but told us our options. The standard practice would be to call an ambulance and get me to a hospital for a c-section - but she wasn't sure I would make it that long. The other option would be to have the baby there and have EMTs on hand in case of any complications. I really didn't want to make a decision at the point, and I don't remember who made the call but we decided to stay put.

I went back in the tub to finish pushing on my knees. The team that was present kept telling me to lean back on Dan but it didn't sound good to me. However, when I finally did, things started to move a long a little faster.

The first thing that popped out was one leg and not long after the butt, body, and finally the head. I had always intend on grabbing him myself and bring him up to my chest, but I wasn't in a good position for that so LaNette grabbed him for me and gave him to me. (I also found out later it was her intent to have me back with my arms over dan so I couldn't grab him. If anyone happened to touch Sean before he was completely out, there was a good chance he would react by flailing his arms and legs and then he would have been stuck and then we would really have a problem on our hands.)

We waited until the cord was drained and the placenta was delivered before cutting the cord. I didn't have a good sense of time, but we stayed in the tub for maybe 10 mins or so after he was born. It was pretty crazy how heavy and exhausted I felt once the water was drained and not supporting my weight anymore.

The next bit of time is a little of a blur, but generally speaking, Dan, Me, and the baby headed to the big king size bed to relax a bit. Everyone gave us plenty of time together as a family before starting any sort of exams on him. The only thing they didn't want to wait on was my exam to check for tearing (and there was a little so a few stitches were needed).

He came out at 6lbs 13oz and 20in long!

Recovery
We still didn't have a name picked out at this point so I really wanted to make sure that was done before time got away from us and before mom and dad came in. It didn't come to us as quickly or as easily as I had thought it would. I was waiting to see his face before deciding, and that helped a little bit but not a lot. I wasn't 100% confidant in the name - we kind of just agreed to go with it. But I like it more every day :)

After a little bit it was time to get me to the bathroom. I had felt pretty good (considering) up to that point but the walk to the bathroom took a while b/c I nearly passed out and we had to take a long break with me on the floor and my feel elevated. At that point they also gave me some dark chocolate to eat. I got up a little bit later and finished the walk to the toilet where not long after I proceeded to pass out. I was able to mumble a quick warning out to them so my doula was behind me for the support/catch.

We spent the night in the center which was a good idea b/c I was very weak and there was another midwife on call all night for us (getting us water and such as needed).

After mom and dad visited, Rae, Violet, and Carol came to visit. I still wasn't really dressed and Sean was sleeping, so it was a short visit, but nice to have.

I started out at 126lbs, ended at 148, and post birth at 135...one month later im down to 124, but still very squishy!

Fun facts I learned post birth

• After the birth, my midwife offered "to give me a tour of my placenta" and I declined. However, she still took a good look for herself. She noted that the placenta looks very used, almost to the point of it being totally done. Based on that and how he looked when he came out (his development and how dry his skin was) she officially recorded that he came out at 41 weeks, instead of 40 weeks based on my due date.
• Sean was the first breach baby LaNette delivered where she was the primary midwife. So, she has attended vaginal breech births, but she was never "in charge".
• If Sean had come out head first, they would have considered me "crowning" by the time that I walked into the birthing center - yikes.
• According to LaNett's records, the average first time mom has a 10 hour labor for the first stage - I did it in 3 hours.

40.2

No baby yet.

Stats:
* Current weight: 148.0. a total of +21.8 from starting weight
* Fundal (sp?) height, 39in - same as last week
* Painful cramping all of last night and mild to medium cramping ever since I got up - with a few occasional sharp pains
* Today is rainy, BMP is falling and there is a new moon tonight.

Laughter?

Somethings up. I just don't seem to laugh as much as I used to. When we went to see kathy griffin a few weeks ago, I didn't laugh very much. Still had a good time, but really it wasn't that funny to me. I thought maybe if I had some booze in me it would have been funnier. Well, last night I watched lisa lampenali (sp?), kathy griffin, and eddie murphy on netflix! I maybe cracked a smile a few time but not much more than that.

*** Update**
Tonight i'm watching anjelah johnson and joe rogan, both pretty funny :) Not quite laughing out loud, but funnier than yesterday.

38 Weeks

I'm tired of waiting....and not in a I'm Impatient kind of way, but in a there's nothing for me to do kind of way. I've cleaned the house a few times over, the baby's room is ready, and my bag is packed. I almost feel like i don't have a reason to get out of bed in the morning. Mon - Fri I get up for work, Sat nothing to do, and Sun I get up to watch the packer game. That's it. Dan still goes out with his friends in the evening and I sit here at my computer watching netflix. I try to plan little last minute events here and there...but then I always end up right back here. I just need to start this new chapter and get on with it.

oh yeah...and I have drymouth.

I'm Calling It - Upate

I'm going to go into labor on a thursday. That means either Sept 19th, 26th, and Oct 3rd.
UPDATE:
Pretty darn close...I went into labor technically on the 4th of Oct, but it's possible early labor started on the 3rd and I just wasn't sure what it was at the time (I did have some very minor cramps at work that day).

37 Weeks

On Friday Dan and I went downtown to see Kathy Griffin live. I was a little bit stressed because the seats were will call, so I was worried we would get stuck in the middle section in a middle row and it would be hard for me to get in and out of the row. Also, parking downtown always stresses me out. Plus, since me and 140 other people bought the will call ticket, I was worried the line would be forever long!

Well, it all ended up being ok. I emailed the theater's ADA service center and told them I'm 9 months pregnant and would like to request an aisle seat so I don't have to climb over people. I was a little worried about asking, but I really didn't have anything to lose. They got back to me and it was great! They saved us a pair of seats at the bottom of a section (so no one was in front) and at the end of row. Also, we found free street parking only a block away and the line for the will call section was crazy short!!

The show was ok, 2  hours was a little long for me - but a quick nice night out.

Starting that night my fingers started to feel arthritic. Ever since them my entire had has felt that way. It's even very painful to open a bottle of water or hold my hair brush. I'm sure it's "normal" but I would like a way to manage the pain - so i'll bring it up tomorrow at my meeting.

Also, LaNette just posted these pictures of the birth center...so now I can start to visualize my space
https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.466729666767443.1073741834.447754221998321&type=3

We had our final meeting with our doula this week too - it went alright. Since I was up late the night before with cramping and she showed up late again, I had an incredibly hard time staying away during our meeting ....and i felt bad. She was over at our house and I wasn't the best host and I probably didn't look that engaged with her when she was talking to us. I did tell her before we started how tired I was so I hope she understood. She gave us A LOT of information. It was mostly about taking care of a baby and breastfeeding tips. She did remind me that she will bring this all up again, she just wants us to hear it at least once before. We were also supposed to watch a video about the 4th trimester, but she forgot to bring it. So, she will be sending it to us to watch later.

Progress?

Another night of what I think are real contractions. They lasted about an 1.5 hours and it was constant...however, the pain gradually increased. I was up when they started and decided to stay up (late) until they went away. I have found it's too hard to manage the pain when i'm trying to sleep...also it would be good for me to practice ways to work through them.

Progress?

I had another night of of really painful "cramps" that kept me up all night. The pain is strong and starts in the middle of my lower back and goes all the way around to the front. definitely not consistent, but did go on for many hours. When I was actually up, the pain was focused more just in the front and felt more like bad period cramps. The pain and cramps eventually faded maybe around 10:30am while at work.

I told my midwife at our appointment today and she's guessing i'm starting effacement. However, I also learned that she really doesn't do internal exams unless requested or really needed. So, I probably wont know my progression. Which is probably a good idea...I can see myself obsessing with the numbers. I'm already slightly obsessing over these contractions.

He dropped a lot already..I think he did it all in a day (sunday). When LaNette did her exam, his head was day down below my bikini line (good think I shaved :))! I even felt his head bone..crazy hard. If she didn't tell me, I would have though it was my pelvic bone.

Swelling

swelling is high today! i can actually feel myself growing. even my ring is tight to put around my pinkie.

36 weeks

I've been so stressed out this week....and it's been with my midwife - which is very unhealthy. I don't want to detail it too much b/c it will stir up anger. But the birthing center opened this past sunday and I got to take a tour and finally have my appointment. The center definitely looks nice, but it's missing a home-y feel. But that might come overtime. Well, what started this whole anger thing is that I was given the contract to the birthing center and it's nothing like what we were told and now it's looking unaffordable and i feel upset b/c she keeps changing her story - lost of trust.

We are going to see her again on sunday for our birthing class, I hope. We are getting their a little early to talk to her. I'm actually having Dan talk to her b/c i'm too worried about getting really upset with her.

Feeling left out...
The Stach's used to hold great family reunion parties every year, but they haven't had one since maybe the year before we got married. I have been looking forward to going to another one, but figured they were over. Well, I guess vicki decided to hold one this year..and it happens to be next weekend! At the time, i will be about 37.5 weeks, so I will be too far along to travel out of state...so we are missing the event :( Family form all over the country are flying into MI..and we are missing it.

Getting upset again, time to stop.

Drama

So, we received our maternity photos back this week. Maybe two weeks ago we saw a sneak peek of one photo on facebook and I really liked it. It was a nice shot and looked very sweet. I had high hopes for the rest of them.Well, when we finally saw them neither dan nor I really liked them. They weren't bad, they were just nothing to get excited over. Oh well...it happens.

Anyways, in the email, our photographer asked us to let her know what we thought of the photos. I debated telling her the truth or not and dan suggested that I do. So, I basically told her that the photos turned out alright but I wasn't excited about them. However, I would still like to buy the digital copies and keep our booking for her to do the newborn session. Well, that didn't turn out so well. She replied back that she doesn't like it when people don't like her work and she doesn't want to do our newborn session anymore and that she will just bill us for the session fee and send us a single digital copy of the sneak peek photo.

Yikes!

I replied back with an apology but that I understood and that I would still like to buy ALL of the photos...I haven't heard back yet. So, now i'm on a scramble to find an affordable photographer on short notice. It definitely would be ok if we didn't get these photos professionally done, but it would be nice :)

Update: Everything seemed to have turned out alright. She emailed me back and seemed ok with everything. She even reiterated that this was her favorite maternity shoot so far. We are all square now...we are paid up and already have the digital copies. I've even found a few affordable options for newborn photos :) things are coming together.

Week 35

work shower
Let's start out with the crabby and end with the good.

I have been really oily lately, it's pretty gross. I normally only shower every other day and that seems to be enough. However, when I do that now, by the time of the second day I feel so gross! Most of the oil seems to be coming from my face. This seems to have been a problem starting maybe just a few weeks ago.

WTH: There has been a strange pattern going lately with "my team". so, on last Sunday we had the no-notification cancellation on the birth class. Then I was supposed to have my actual prenatal appointment with LaNette this past tuesday. I left work early to go the appointment but right before I left I decided to just play on facebook for min (which I normally wouldn't do) and happen to notice that LaNette posted that she was on here way to a birth about an hour before. I decided to text her...well, of course our appointment was cancelled and she forgot to tell me. I didn't receive this "noticed" until I was only about 5 min from her house. I guess at least I found out before I rang the bell! Well, the next day we reschedule the appointment for this friday (yesterday) for 8:00am. I set my alarm early so I can get there ontime. when I wokeup I had a text waiting for me that she was at another birth and we need to reschedule again. Well, we are supposed to meet tomorrow afternoon - so we'll see if that happens.

Along the same lines, we had our first meeting with our doula on thursday. We headed out to get to our appointment and after we were on the road for maybe 5-10 min, we get a text that she would like to push the meeting back by 30min. Ok fine, we turned around...took Mr T for a walk and headed out again. We get to her office and she isn't there...she calls me just after 7 and goes "i'm here" and I reply back with "i'm here too". Well, we were waiting at her office and she was waiting at our house. Eventually she made it to her office and we started the appointment almost an hour after our original appointment.

And that segway into the good part of the week

The meeting with our doula went really well. I really didn't know what to expect so I was pretty surprised (and tired!!) that the meeting lasted about 3 hours - so until 11:30pm. So, first good thing. We still really like her - we all got a long well and were kind of chatty so that's a good sign. The second thing, the appointment ended up being a crash bradley course in the three stages of labor. Most of it I've sort of read before, but it's always good to hear it again.

Final good thing this week - I had a surprise baby shower at work from my team :) It was only an hour long, so it went pretty fast but it was cute. They decorated at meeting room and even had a few games! I was super surprised too that they had a gift for us - the swing! So, generous. The funny thing is that we ended up buying the swing maybe a week ago or so, but I didn't say anything. So, tomorrow we are going to return the one I bought (since it's still in the box).

Oh, and this weekend we are trying to finish up the baby stuff- and are getting pretty darn close. the baby's room is done and his clothes are in the dresser. Also, as I type Dan is installing the car seat and putting the swing together :) )

34 weeks

Over the weekend I went to a Sacred Pregnancy meeting. I wasn't sure what it was, but a friend of mine's friend is a Sacred Pregnancy instructor (the 1st one in the state) and held an initial free event to give everyone a sample of what it's all about. I found out about all of this through a facebook invite.

I was extremely hesitant to go because honestly it seemed it little too hippie for me. I believe in all of that stuff but it's a little on the deep end for me and I'm still in the shallows. I was also hesitant to go b/c I was worried it would be a big crying fest. I've been emotional lately and really don't want to start the waterworks.

Well, I went to the event and it was pretty good. There were general introductions and then a craft. All of which was ok. I felt really out of place b/c everyone there was in that industry of healing and birth and I had to introduce myself as an office worker. However, everyone was very nice and welcoming.

We had to make the crafts for each other (we drew names). The lady that drew my name latched onto my introduction when I said, "I'm just a technical writer". She went on this thing on how that either meant I don't love what I do or that I don't love myself and that what I do matters. I thought that was pretty bold for just meeting me a few minutes ago. I ended up drawing the name of the woman that hosted the event - so my project was pretty easy. I just made something to thank her for bringing us together and to congratulate her on her new journey.

The last activity was the hardest because we sat in a circle and gave our intentions to the salt bowl. That's when all of the crying started (I held back).

Overall, the event was pretty relaxing which I needed. It was a lot for me to handle, but it would be good for me to do it in smaller doses. However, I felt bad after the event b/c I didn't give it my all. I held back a lot and tried to confine my emotions. I was worried that I brought bad energy to the circle.

The next day the woman who hosted the event sent me message and said, "What a blessing your presence was in the circle!". It made me feel better for a little bit that I didn't ruin her event, but at the same time I wonder if she was just saying something nice.

Here's a link to pictures from the event: https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.632238790143866.1073741830.602869873080758&type=1

33 weeks

So, on friday afternoon/morning I posted a blog that Dan Jr. was moving around a lot. Well, that night (while i was sleeping) I had the WORST cramping ever. It was all the way around from my back to my front. It kept me up for a few hours. I texted LaNette and she wasn't sure what that was b/c it sounded a little strong to be a braxton hicks. well, pause in the story...

Today, we got up early and went to LaNette's house for our birthing class! well, we got there only to find out class was cancelled :( LaNette had 4 births in the last week with the most recent one ending around 6:30am (and class was supposed to start at her house at 9am). However, I never got the message b/c she had her assistant do the texting and I guess she texted the wrong "stephanie s."

Back to the story, while I was at LaNette's this morning I thought I would ask about what all that pain was I was going through the other night. She deduced that dan jr just made a big movement. He used to be laying face back/back up and he has since turned completely around and is now laying facing up with his back to my back. She says a movement that big mixed with the general position causes a lot of strain on my uterus. He is defiantly not in an ideal position but I guess there is enough time for him to fix is position and it shouldn't be as big of a deal as it was for him to turn back around.

**
Yesterday, mom and I went shopping and bought up the rest of the stuff that we need for the baby (well, at least for the first few weeks). Once of those items included a the stroller/car seat - which dan assembled today. Also, i finished my crib skirt! Now, I just have to clean the baby's room and I can attach the skirt.

Movement

Lots and Lots and Lots of movement today. This is a little unusual..and pretty uncomfortable.

32 week

Pregnancy is boring
my house is dirty and cluttered already
it's hard to write thank you cards when you're crabby

one positive - we had our pregnancy photoshoot yesterday. It was short and sweet and I can't wait to see the pics

This weekend alone i've gotten "you are so small" and "you are getting really big" and two people said "you aren't going to make it until your due date"

31 weeks - The Shower

My shower was this weekend and it went really!! It was held at Holler Park just down the road from us, the weather was great, and maybe 25-30 people were there (both sides and friends). It was theme "jungle animal" and it was super cute! I had a great time and it went by super fast.

• Cute baby shower items:
• Tiff made that watermelon baby carriage fruit basket thing - it turned out great.
• There were a bunch of diapers available for people to write cute notes on
• There was a cardbaord picture frame for people to sign - that activity was a little light
• Little blue pacifiers were frozen in ice cubes...first person whos "water breaks" one a  prize
• Gift bingo
• Little diapers wrapped up like diapers with milk balls in them
• The gift opening was fun, but also awkward. It took about an hour to get through everything and I almost broke a sweat it was so warm sitting up there.
• I didn't have much time to look around the room, but man did I see some board faces!! But at the same time there were some smiley faces in the front row :)
• After the shower a bunch of people came over after the shower and that was extremely overwhelming! the house was crowded, kitchen was messy, and everyone wanted to see the baby's room  - but it's not anything close to ready, or even cute to look at yet. 
• Dan's mom and 2 of this sisters (and one boyfriend) stayed at the house. It was a lot of fun having them here and also very exhausting. very much a whirl-wind weekend.
• This whole time too I've been fighting a cold.
• We got a lot of stuff and surprisingly not too many things we need to return  - though I haven't sorted through all of the clothes yet. Also, unfortunately, there were nearly no gift receipts, so most of it will be a pain in the butt to return anyways. And there's also a lot of stuff we need to buy still..
• There defiantly were some re-gifts and even a few used item.
• ...This post is bumming me out (it's making me mentally recap all the petty things that got me upset this weekend)...i think i just need more sleep.
• Now that it's over, time to move on and focus on our new family
• OH yeah, i forgot to mention the cake. Mom asked me where I wanted my cake from and I said that it would be just fine if she made a cake but that I don't like grocery store cakes. I was kind of hoping she would make the cake just b/c the only other option left would be to spend a lot of money at a regular bakery. Well, she bought a grocery store cake (from sendiks) and I didn't like it. However, it was decorated super cute (they copied the picture from my shower invites) and a lot of people at the shower said they really liked the cake. Mom even said that she told the lady at the grocery store that "my daughter doesn't like grocery store cakes" and they lady said back "well, we will have to change her mind about that!". Mom was so impressed she wants to go back to the store and personally thank that lady for making such a good cake. I never told my mom what I thought of the cake b/c it's really not important and she's so happy with the outcome. However, if she would ever directly ask me what I thought, I would say something.

30 Frickin' Weeks!

Yikes...and the 10 week countdown begins.

• Another good prenatal appointment. "everything is perfect" Dan jr is still head down and i guess he'll probably stay that way from now on. LaNette is estimating that he's about 2.25lbs, which is a little smaller than all the online resources are telling me (maybe 2.5-3lbs).

• I got my first shower gift this week too :) My Aunt Penny from Florida sent out a gift to mom's house. Mom gave me the option to wait until the shower or see it now...i chose to see it now hehe. It's a highchair!

• We had another doula interview this week (and another one tonight). Though it was better than the first one, it really didn't go that well. She seemed to have more confidence and i'm assuming this is coming from her background in nursing, but really she again only has maybe 5-7 births under her belt and they have all been at a hospital. however, this girl did have clients that she was not familiar with and seems to be moving in a more holistic direction. Overall, we still weren't impressed and at this point neither of those girls would be any better than just maybe having my mom there (and she would be free!). If these next few interviews go just as bad, I think i'm passing on a doula and will just look for an extra set of hand for dan from friend or family....

• Update: I had to stop writing this blog to take another doula interview. this one was great!! this lady was great, confident, experienced, knowledgeable, has homebirth experience, has worked with lanette before, and if affordable! she's bradely class instructor, certified in breastfeeding, infant massage, accupunture and herbal medicine, etc. etc. so cool.

• Dan's mom sent us an email early this week that she wants to "surprise" us by getting us a gliding rocker for a shower gift. This is a super sweet gesture, but it has ended up being a stressful one. Realistically, i don't think i want a glider. Vicki was adamant that we need one - a big comfy one. But when I think about it, it's just a big bulky expensive piece of furniture that I don't have room for and once i'm done with the bulk of the nursing, will just be something else I have to deal with. And if i'm really thinking that, it would be a waste of her money to get us a glider. We tried to tell her, but she said that she would just feel better knowing that we had one...the only thing holder her back was that the one we "wanted" was not in stock. So, that night (and during my lunch break) we ran out to the store to sit on all the rockers again and we weren't able to find one that was big enough and comfortable. So, we told vicki and she since has seemed to change her mind that if we really didn't want it, she wouldn't get it. so, now we are back at square one.

29 weeks

We were supposed to have our first pediatrician meeting this week. We are only interviewing two, one male and one female - and the female is also a lactation consultant. In both cases, we only have 15 min meetings with the docs. That really isn't enough time to go through all of the questions I have to ask. It's nearly not worth going - but w/e.

Anyways, the reason why we were supposed to me but didn't was b/c an hour before our appointment, I received a call cancelling the appointment! I was pretty upset for the extremely short notice - but i don't really know what's going on. we'll see.

We also had our first doula interview this week. LaNette gave me a few choices and the first option is already full, so I went to the second choice. Well, it was pretty horrible. The girl is very new (which is why we are seeing her b/c she's charges at least 1/2) but she's just seems TOO NEW. She's seems to be lacking a lot of confidence. It was almost awkward. As soon as she left, dan and I just had to look at each other and we new this wouldn't work. I fell a little bad not hiring her b/c I know what's it's like to need people to give you a chance, but in the case of my birth - I just can't do it. I will be probably in my most week and vulnerable state and I need everyone in that room to have at least as much confidence as me and preferable a lot more!! LaNette commandeered her and now i'm a little skeptical of the other recommendations. So, for the rest of the interview, i went out and did a search on my own. So, we have two more doula interviews next week. One lady actually sounds too good to be sure - she's been in the practice since 2008 and she's certified in infant massage, labor and delivery acupuncture, a lactation consultant, and she's a teacher in the bradely method. Yikes.

I'm that pregnant lady

Just this week I've noticed that I think i'm 'finally' being noticed at work. People who don't normally talk to me, are taking to me and people that don't normally say Hi, are saying hi. I'm wondering if it's kind of like MSOE, where a bunch of guys knew who you were and acted like we know each other...but really I had no idea who they were - but they probably knew me b/c I was one of maybe 2 girls in their glass.
It's a little awkward for me, b/c it's taking me off guard and i'm already pretty quiet around the office. It's almost like, "who me, [looks behind] are you talking to me?"

28 Weeks

• I was able to get over my sinus infection and I would like to give full credit to my Breathe oil :) Maybe a week after my first symptom and my urine test showed I probably had an infection. Fortunately, I was already getting blood work done that day so LaNette checked for an infection and everything came up great!
• Mom's birthday is coming up and we celebrated her birthday on sunday. it was her idea that instead of buying her gifts, we would all buy gifts for Dan Jr. I thought it was strange, but also cute. She also decided that I would open the gifts that she brought over for Dan Jr and she would open the ones that Dan and I bought her. It was awkward at first, but it ended up being pretty cool.
• It was actually pretty stressful thinking of something to buy. I thought a good compromise would be to buy a baby item but something that would be just for "grandma's house". I did a fair about of research and asking around and we ended up buying a changing table and changing pad/cover (both used) and then bought two storage bins for the table (new) and changing pad waterproof pads. 
  
• And mom and dad bought Dan Jr a radio flyer bike, a few cute shirts, a memory book, and a piggy bank. 
  
• We started rearranging the dressers between the rooms. It's a pretty small/easy step (and there's a long way to go) but it kind of seems like a big deal - another visual change.

Changes

• My inner thighs are killing me!! It feels like i've been using the thigh-master for days on end. I had originally thought it was from my ballet squats i need to do to reach the ground. however, i've been paying attention to that and I really don't do it that much and I finally looked it up and it seems to be related to the stretching of my pelvic bone. It's been going on for a little bit but only recently has it really become a problem. It's very hard to get up and start walking from my desk (or any sitting position). The pain lessons but doesn't go away. And per google, it will stay trough the birth.
• A number of people tell me that I should document my belly. Well, I haven't been very good at it, but I've been taking occasional photos and have profession photos being take soon. However, even though this will document the size/growing of my belly, it doesn't document by belly button! i was worried that it would pop out..and it hasn't but it still looks pretty strange (it got all flat and squishy and looks like it's going to implode). ** I took a picture of it, but it really doesn't prove my point.

RLS

I've had RLS (I like to call it Sleepy Leg) for a while, but it's pretty infrequent. Also, I tend to ignore it b/c it sounds like a bogus condition. However, in the last month or so I've noticed it happening pretty frequently - maybe once or twice a week. It's pretty annoying when it's frequent. WELL, my 28 week pregnancy email told me RLS is very common in pregnant women! Dang, I went from no symptoms to all of them!

27 Weeks

• I finally got to go swimming this weekend. I thought it was going to be awesome but really it wasn't much different than swimming any other time. the only difference is that when I first got out of the pool I felt I i had just instantly gained 40lbs!
• I ordered my thank you notes this weekend too. Mom said that I should probably only order enough for the people who RSVPd to my shower, but I ended up ordering enough for every person I invited. 
  
• Mom and I finished up my registry this weekend too. There wasn't too much too add, but that's done and out of the way now.
• I just took a quick glimps into our finances for while on maternity leave and it's a little scary. There will be a little bit of money coming in but essentially i'm planning on only having dan's money coming in and it's not enough to cover all of our basic expenses (mortgage, groceries, bills, and gas) - no including any baby items or doctor visits....::sigh:: I always hear that "you'll make it work"...but I don't really know how.
• I got another massage. It's not really taking away my pains, but it seems to give me more energy for the next day or so. I could really use one weekly :)
• I mentioned to dan that come sept we need to give the kitchen floor a really good scrub. Well dan jumped on it right away :) He spend most of the day scrubbing on his hands and knees. The floor looks great now, but the probably will be keeping up with it. I'm thinking of investing in a full size floor cleaning. once we have a little one on the move, we cant' have such dirty floors.
• UPDATE: I forgot to mention that I finally bought a handful of maternity clothes. I actually was able to find a few cute options! I bought maybe 4 tops from Motherhood Maternity, and two tanks and one dress from Old Navy. However, the Old Navy items weren't maternity specific, they were just maternity friendly. I was able to stay withing in my budget though which is great! It's surprisingly a lot more conformable than I thought it would be. So far, worth the money.

Week 26

I'm glad I do this blog. For the past few weeks i've been thinking of skipping b/c there isn't really much to write about. however, when i take a moment to really think about it, I have relatively a lot to say - it may not be that important, but it might be interesting later.

• We held our first rummage sale to help make room for baby. We only made about $200, but we were able to get rid of a number of large items. Running the rummage was pretty boring, but it was kind of nice to get a chance to get the know the neighbors a little bit more. they invited us over to their house for a BBQ, it was surprisingly fun.
• Speaking of making money, I decided to keep the rug and of course right as I do, I get a few more inquires. However, there's probably a good chance these would have fallen through too.
• I had put an ISO (in search of) for that fabric and someone found and it told me! So, I went to 2 different joann fabrics and was able to get 3 yards of the stuff :) so, I think i'll pass on buying the stuff from that lady and just try to make the stuff myself.
• my belly is really getting big. I think this weekend i'll have to give in and go get some maternity tops. This morning I dug into the bag of clothes that Sarah sent me and wore one to work. I didn't feel comfortable in it, I don't like the style, and it very much looks like a maternity shirt - so much so that the ladies at work mentioned something. They asked if it was a maternity top b/c they have been noticing that I haven't really been wearing anything that looks maternity. My boss thinks it's cute.
• The RSVP's for my shower were due...with quite a few missing responses (in either direction). only 50% of people responded, and a few of those were follow-ups my mom had to chase after the due date.
• I have another sinus infection coming and literally just got over one! However, I remembered that I had some breathe oil blend that I thought i would try diffusing at night and in the shower and putting it under my nose - and I don't know if it's a coincidence, but it really seems to be working! I've totally noticed a difference. I've only had a sample of the stuff, so today I picked up a full bottle. Hopefully this will keep away any more infections for the rest of this pregnancy!
• I have been experiencing quite a bit of stiffness in my hips that only seems to happen when I try to stand up after sitting down for maybe 1/2 hour or more. It takes a few minutes for it to clear up but on a few occasions I haven't even been able to stand up straight right away.

Movement

On saturday Dan felt the baby move for the first time. I was pretty surprised b/c we have been trying to get him to feel the baby for a month or more and nothing has happened.
We were lying down watching tv and he just randomly put his hand on my belly and he said he felt a kick! It was pretty light, so I didn't think of saying anything, but he said he could feel it. I'm wondering if the difference was that the movement was higher up on my belly and normally it's pretty low. Either way, not an earth-shattering event but still pretty cool :)

Weeks 24-25

Lots to talk about

• Dan and I went to a painting class this week to paint super hero paintings. If they turned out well, I wanted to hang them in the nursery...well, they did so we are now doing a super hero nursery!! However, i'm struggling a little bit b/c all of the sheets and other linens I picked out for the room is light colored and has zoo animals on it.... I'm having a hard time making the two things work. 
  
• I'm in the process of trying to decided on a quilt for the nursery. I actually came across some fabric on etsy that has super hero jungle animals on the print!! however, the woman doesn't have much of the fabric left and can't find more to order. so, no i'm struggling to decide what we can do with it. normally, i would just take the direction of the esty shop owner, but i'm not particularly a fan of her personal style - she just happens to have the fabric that I want. Here is the fabric i'm trying to work with

• This Sunday I will hit the 100 day mark :)
• This week we booked our daycare too. We decided on the learning edge out in oak creek. So far, I really like the place and the staff, I just don't like the price :( however, if you consider the hourly rate we are paying, it really isn't that much.
• Heartburn and indigestion are starting to kick in. it's not too painful yet, but it does seem to linger a while.
• It's becoming increasingly more difficult to sit. I'm having a lot of pain/pressure on my tailbone. Sometimes even sitting on a pillow hurts. Before I was pregnant I had a lot of pressure on my lower back and I could do this little trick in my chair to release it, but it not longer works.

Week 23

Well, I'm sick again with another sinus infection. I didn't even know I was sick until I started having the face pane. I called LaNette and she told me to go to the doc right away. She freaked me out a bit, to the point I started crying - that intern freaked out everybody else at work. I just ended up leaving, going to the doc an then took the rest of the day off. I hated using up another sick day but I really needed the rest. Luckily, it was a nice day. So, I'm on another round of 10 day antibiotics.

My tummy really grew this week! I even had my first growth spurt - and LaNette said it's normal around this time and i'll go through probably one more spurt. But everything looks great. Dan even says i looked bigger than when we left a week ago! The belly touching/talking has started and also seems to have simultaneously increased. However, it doesn't seem to bother me that much. Maybe it will when it happens for a while, but I think it's kind of cute right now.

I had my first real bought of uncomfortableness too. It was all in my lower abdomen - a lot of pressure. I wasn't sure, but it felt like he was laying deep in my pelvis, sideways. I like to call it "hammocking" :)
Well, during my apt this week, I found out I was right! Dan Jr is currently sitting transverse in my tummy, face up, with his head on my left side. Speaking of my apt, mom came with me this time - so she could meet LaNette. Everything seemed to go well. She even showed us the plans for her new place. It looks very cool!

Week 22

hmm..

I guess on Saturday I had my first (and probably last) chiropractic apt. It was the same usual crap I'm used it. However, this time it was pretty uncomfortable and I can imagine it's only going to get worse.

I also had a gripe this week b/c i'm officially dealing with Aurora and insurance companies again!!!!! I want to keep the details short since thinking about it stresses me out, but I got my bill from the US and it wasn't covered...about a $600 bill. So, now I'm in the process of tracking the insurance company and contact the US center...lame. I'm so glad I don't need to deal with this shit with the entire prenatal and birthing process.

My shower is moving along, Tiff volunteered to help my mom plan so that's super awesome. I think it's great she offered and it will help my mom out a lot. Also, she's a fellow party planner so I know she'll be good. Also, my mom sent out the invites this week and Tiff is listed as a co-host. I also got my first RSVP today too, from Jessie :)

Bleeding Gums

Really nothing to mention, but I just wanted to make sure that I log this for future reference.
On occasion I have noticed my gums bleeding when I brush my teeth in the morning and once when I was flossing at night. I went to the dentist about a week before I go pregnant and have another apt this july. So, she can check up on things then.

Week 21

Feeling good this week. However my tailbone has started to hurt when I'm sitting down. I'm not sure what it is yet, but I'm wondering if it has something to do when I fell and hurt it a few winters ago.
Tomorrow I have my first appointment with a chiropractor so I will probably bring that up with him. I've already done a consult and this first appt will be a full evaluation....so, we'll see!

Mom is sending out my babyshower invites this week :) I'm pretty excited. It should be a lot of fun. I know it's really hard to get people together in the summer, but I hope a lot of people can make it!!! Here's the invites she picked out. Mom really thinks that I should probably register at Target, but I don't really want to. But, when Dan is gone the first week of June mom and I will go and see if there are a few things I can find to register for there.

I really think my belly has gotten bigger! I feel it's grown a bunch just in the last couple days. But it could just be me and/or just be that Dan Jr is shifting around.

I also gained my first official pound this week (based on my pre pregnancy weight). That puts be behind the normal amount, but Dan Jr is growing just right so everything seems to be good :)

For my birthday mom gave me some cash to buy something fun. Well, I spent part of it on this!!

For his first holiday :)


We visited another daycare this week - Kindercare. Everyone tells me to stay the heck away from that place, but I really wanted to form my own opinion and/or really see why it would be so horrible. Well, it wasn't the monstrosity I expected, but it defiantly wasn't good. Overall, the center seemed very rundown. there was minimal toys/activities and what was there looks very very worn and dirty. The teachers didn't seem loving and caring. They also seemed dirty and there were just there to do a job and really didn't seem to love what they do. The only good thing I could say was that the director was very nice and she seemed genuine but that's about it. And to top it all off, this center was the most expensive out of all the places we've visited!!

Week 20

Nearly incredible weeks!

On Friday I took the day off and we went to the OB to get a scan and measurements of the baby and find out the sex :)

First, the baby looks healthy. No abnormalities were found and he's measuring right in the 50% 'tile.
Second, we are having a boy!!!!!! I'm so excited :)
It took a while to see the sex b/c he was crouched up like a thanksgiving turkey and his feet were over this parts. The doc tried to shake him and had me do a few laps around the place but he wasn't moving enough (Oh, and he's breech right now too) to see, so he had to do the vaginal ultrasound. I wasn't looking forward to that b/c my paps are painful - but I wasn't going to let that stop me - however, this didn't hurt at all!!

It was so incredible to see him moving :) Dan even got a couple of movie we can share. My favorite part was when we were looking straight on to his face and his mouth was open and he was moving is tongue around.

We haven't told anyone the sex yet. We are however, sending both our parents and my grandparents a gender announcement egg. They should be receiving it in a couple days :)

The second thing that happened (just today actually) is we made a first attempt at registering  It seems a bit early to do this, but I'm glad I'm giving myself time to really thing about what's out there and do research. It's so overwhelming! We were out for 5 hours today and if you are going by the "must have" lists people make, we are nowhere near what we need. I think we are close though..might just need to up the quantity of blankets and stuff we picked out.

The stores try to tell you need to register for 5 items per number of guests you are inviting. Well, at least for my family, that is crazy. I've never seen anyone probably buy more than 2 items.

I wish I had a better story to tell here, but my brain hurts so I think I'll stop.

Quickening?

Maybe, but I'm not fully convinced.

If so, I left my first movement on Sunday, May 5th (week 18) after sitting down and taking a break in swing dance class. The feeling since then has been getting more frequent, but I'm not so sure. I guess it's going to take an actual kick to convince met.

Today's Craving (Week 20)

EVERYTHING! I'm super hungry the last few days. If I literally had enough room in my stomach I could have cleared off my Tour of Italy plate at Olive Garden yesterday.

19 weeks

Some new symptoms this week - which seem to make more sense after I met with my midwife and she told me this is the time of the pregnancy where my blood volume really starts to increase.

• More spider veins started to pop up. I have seem them on  my ankles for a while...but just this week they starts to pop up on my chest and rib cage. It's not the best thing, but I'll take those over varicose veins or stretch marks!
• Holly bloody noes batman! It's not actually dripping but ever since sunday every time I blow my noes the kleenx if fully red!

weeks 16-18

Well, I was really stressed out about April, but I made it through - but w/out time to blog much!

Week 16 - We went to Phoenix to visit Melissa and her family :)

Sangria and lemon olive oil cupcake

In front of the belly tree!

Week 17 - I competed in Swing Dance America. I took 2nd place in the newcomer division! I didn't social dance much, I left successful.
Dan did a lot of progress on the baby's room too - he finished caulking the walls and pulled out the carpet

Me and my partner competing in finals

Week 18 - Dan, mom, and I went to a just between friends baby and maternity resale event. I was expecting the worse but it actually ended up being really great - and a first hit of reality of how quickly that stuff adds up!

We bough a bassinet, some sort of table top vibrating seat thing (Sarah said we HAD to have one), a breast pump (just need to buy about $40 worth of stuff), 2 baby carriers, a pack of receiving blanks, and a pair of froggy slippers :). It all cost about $200 - which is a lot of money, but if we went the store, the breast pump alone would have been more than that....yikes.

I'm still in my "normal clothes" and my weight has been about the same. However, my cravings have increased...just in general...for eating. I can't seem to eat enough. I'm not sure if I should indulge in the extra calories b/c maybe I need them or should I continue to be careful.

Today's Craving (week 15)

Bread and Mayo....yeah, I could eat them alone but I would take the full sandwich if available.

It also happens to be national grilled cheese day. I don't think i'll be able to have one today, but since we are going out for mexican tonight, I think i'll have a quesadilla - like a mexian grilled cheese?!

Week 15

Yikes, April is an extremely busy month. I was very stressed out about it even starting b/c of the anticipation of all the things I had to (however, most of it is fun stuff). We are 11 days in and it's not so bad.

This weekend
This weekend we have a friend flying in from Alabama (as in, he's a pilot and is flying in) and then we are all going up to Duluth for the day to have dinner with Dave's parents. I'm a little nervous for the flight since it's such a small plane. It should be ok but.......

Cute text
Last night I got the cutest/gibberish text from my grandma last night. It was mostly incoherent, but it was a lot of cute stuff about how she loves us and that we will be great parents and she can't believe her first grandchild is also having her first great grandchild. It really caught me off guard b/c the English was pretty hard to read and it came from an unknown number (I didn't have her cell number in my phone). I sent it to mom and she said it reminded her of this sweet she wrote for dad. I couldn't really read it from the photo but it was some sweat letter to "her first born". I never have really seen grandma as much of a sentimental - so it was cute.

Essential Oils
I just came from a meeting at my midwife's house regarding essential oils. A lot of cool stories were shared about how oils have come in handy. I believe in a lot of their uses, but so far i'm not ready to jump in b/c of the cost. However, i think once we actually have a baby/child I think it will become a lot more beneficial to their health.

• you can use them to make safe all purpose cleaners for their toys and other things
• kids prefer them over medicine b/c they don't have to taste it and it generally smells nice
• if they still are fussy, you can sneak the oils onto their feet when they are sleeping
• it might even help prevent some of the many illnesses they will acquire in day care

The starter kit I want is $550, so yeah that's pretty pricey - so we'll see.

Next trip
Next weekend we are going to Arizona to see Melissa!!!!!!!!!!!

Hot liquid
Tuesday at lunch I dumped super hot tea onto my hand while at at a work lunch. My hand is ok (minus some general heat sensitivity) but it looked really bad right when it happened and I had to excuse myself to the bathroom so I could go and cry!
Well, today at the oils meeting, some B dumped hot coffee over and got it on my foot. So now I have hot coffee on my foot! Once again, nothing bad..but come on!

Weight
I lost about 4 lbs right away when I got pregnant and have been very consistent with it ever since. Well this week I jumped up 2 lbs. not a big deal, but it's my first weight gain. I don't think i look big but I have a very tiny friend who at 28 weeks only looks at big as I do now..or even did a few weeks ago!

Target
I had some time to kill while waiting to meet a friend for dinner so I decided to walk around the baby section at target and actually learned a few things:

• they sell A LOT of stuff you don't need, but once you see it you think that you do
• infant mattresses are uncomfortable
• breast pumps look scary
• bobbies are pricier than I had anticipated
• they make mesh baby bumpers to help prevent suffocation
• i'm even more convinced that I can use a puma bag for my diaper bag

13 weeks

I almost didn't post anything this week because I didn't really know what to say...

• I fell for the first time (and hopefully last) at hot water this past wednesday. It actually wasn't that bad. My left knee took most of the hit and then I just fell to my hands. I felt find afterwards and feel fine now - except for my knee. that hurts pretty bad
• We went out for mexican on friday. I overate and came home super stuffed but felt fine. I came home and realized I forgot to take my prenatal and tried right away. I gagged it back up (which isn't anything new) but in addition to the pill came come liquid.....and then the rest of my meal. Ever since, I've been having a hard time keeping some food down. I get stuffed really fast and have little bit of heartburn.
• Dan and I ran to a few maternity consignment shops this weekend. I didn't buy anything but I was able to get an idea of what is out there. The prices seem right - nothing really over $10.

Week 13 reflections

2012 was an awesome year because I:

• Travel to Jamaica
• Learned how to swing dance
• Learned how to salsa
• Placed in the top 3 at my first swing dancing competition
• Got a new job (voluntarily this time) :)
• Sky dived with my mom for her 55th birthday
• Traveled to Germany to attend one of the biggest parties in the world
• Spent Christmas in Disney and drank my way "around the world" at Epcot

It was a pretty fricken awesome year, but in 2013 my list will just have one thing on it

• I had a baby

Week 12

I think I "popped" this week. However, if I wasn't pregnant you might just think that I just had a really big meal. But I think otherwise it's pretty noticeable.  One of my bosses said she could already tell before I said something but didn't want to ask me (though I don't know how long ago she was able to tell).

This week we also announced the new to the world (facebook and both of our jobs). Here is the final facebook photo we ended up going with.

It was pretty nerve-racking letting out the news. Never know how people will take it.
Grandma and grandpa are very excited but it seemed to take a little while to sink in. By the end of the night grandma was extremely excited. What was funny was that grandpa actually going to come in that day and tell us "i'm not getting any younger" about giving him a great grandchild :) He turns 75 this year. Grandma said that she will keep the card in her keepsake box (which I didn't even know she had).

Maybe it's just tonight but I'm starting to get a little sad of the idea of getting used to this new life. I'm excited about the future but at the same time it will be a big transition. My priorities will change w/out me even having to try, my friends will go and hopefully i'll make new ones, no more happy hours or late nights out downtown. Many of which are not fulfilling activities but you feel "included". But life is moving on and here we go!

Week 11

Let's start out by saying I'm exhausted, starving, and freezing. I'm sitting in the living room with my winter coat and hood on and a few numb fingers waiting for the house to get warm!

We had my second midwife apt this week and it will probably be the best one as we heard the heartbeat and even a couple kicks! We were able to record it and send it to my parents and dan's parents. They both thought it was so awesome. I had texted it to vicki and was wondering what was taking so long to respond, but it was because she was listening to it so many times :)

We are thinking about redoing our announcement photo. I found something a little cuter on instagram that we are going to try....we'll see how it turns out!

We told the horseshoe group last night. we were both pretty nervous on who would even show up and what they would say. But, the news was received very well by everyone. A lot more excitement than I had thought. Mom told Carol too that night (with her mug) but Carol didn't get the hint right away so it seemed a little uneventful. Tomorrow we are telling my grandparents with the card I made them. so, with that i'm going to segway into i gotta run b/c i have a lot of cleaning to do before tomorrow afternoon!

Pizza and Wings, bye!

Week 10

Was extremely busy! It's actually day one of week 11.
The most notable thing last week was that I did my first (and hopefully not my last) swing dance weekend and competition. It went pretty well, but overall not that great. To be honest I missed my liquid courage a little - need it for asking people to dance. However, not dancing too much probably wasn't a bad thing. I wasted to take it easy for the first time since, even when i'm healthy and non pregnant  those weekends are extremely exhausting. I really want to place in a competition (again) before I can't dance anymore!!

Today's Craving (week 10)

Takeout. I don't care too much what it is, I just won't want to make it!

Announcement

This weekend we worked on the facebook announcement photo. It of course was inspired by pinterest :)
It took a lot more time to pull together than I thought, and the original idea didn't even end up working that well. We probably spent an hour or so on Friday night drawing the picture on the chalkboard and 3 hours the next morning taking photos! I got my hair done about 3 days earlier and didn't wash it until after the photo was taken so it would still look good..hehe.

Here is the inspiration photo and then what we ended up with (I'm not sure yet which one I'll post).

 

Rats

So I have a sinus infection :( I'm on antibiotics (amoxicillian) for the next 7-10 days. Even when I'm not pregnant I'm not a fan of taking much medication, so I am a little worried. However, I trust my midwife and she is ok with me on these meds. She says it's better to get this taken care of then let an infection get worse. I guess the meds I'm on are class B, which I was just told is a safe medication class.

Let's hope we all get past this in the best of health!

Week 9

I'm still getting over my cold/flu but I feel a lot better! I also finally got in touch with my midwife. She seems a little concerned (which is concerning me) but I'm not going to worry too much until there really is something to worry about! If I'm not 100% by monday or if I get worse, she wants me in by next week.
To try to clear up my sinuses I'm using a deffuser at night, eating homemade chicken broth, stopped drinking juices, and will start using the humidifier tonight while I sleep.

I also told me boss this week that I'm pregnant. I know it's a little early BUT, Dan decided to tell his boss a few weeks ago in hopes that he will get a bigger raise. Well, I just had my yearly performance review with my boss and told her then in hopes of the same result - no luck. But she is super excited and already says "we have to plan a shower!". I had a fun time that afternoon chatting with her about baby stuff! With every person I tell, I get just a little bit more excited :)

I'm hoping tomorrow morning to take my announcement photo. I was a the salon yesterday so i'm hoping my hair style lasts one more night (I'm not washing it!!). I was hoping to take the photo at Melissa's place in Arizona but we moved our trip to April, so that's a little far out for me...I couldn't wait that long!

Today's Craving (week 8)

Churros....yeah, I don't have access to those.

Sophie!

We got our first baby gift today :) Dan's mom surprised us by sending Sophie La Girafe with a post-it attached that said every teething baby needs a sophie.

I of course had no idea what "a sophie" is, but I did like that the box was in french! I googled sophie and found this cute story...Story about Sophie. Overall, I guess she's the number 1 toy on amazon, there is almost one sophie sold in france for every one birth, and was really hard to sell in the US at first (until celebrity babies were spotted using it).

Today's Craving (week 8)

Nothing! I'm sick, i.e. little/no appetite and everything tastes bland.

8 weeks

Blah! I've been sick most of the week. I've tried emailing and texting my midwife and she hasn't responded...it's unlike her. Nothing seems to be an emergency though, so I'm just leaving it for now.

This week was our first week at making weekly to-do lists. We created a large to-do list a about a month ago but progress has been slow. I want to make sure I/We are as productive as possibly before I start to get too big to do much. I'm happy to say that even though I've been sick. i'm not too far behind in my list :) I didn't schedule anything on the weekend, so that will be my catch-up time.

This past sunday I bought a bunch of new bras. I was loooong over due for them before so I finally went out bra shopping - since everything I read says "get a good bra!" I got maybe 5 new bras for $70. Most of them are convertibles too, so hopefully I can use those instead of strapless.

My grandparents are coming up here for st patty's day and even though it will be a few weeks too early, i'm going to tell them while they are up here. It won't be too early though, about 11 weeks and we will hear the heartbeat (for the first time) just a few days before. I wanted some cute way to tell them so I made them a card (which was a checked-off item on my to-do list!). Dan thinks it's a little confusing but mom really likes it.

Today's Craving (week 7)

Salami! and it's something I can't have....

End of Week 7

Not much to report this week. I almost skipped my post; however, this was the first time I really had to explain why I'm not drinking....

So far at horseshoes Dan has been bottling ice tea for me in beer bottles so it looks like I've been drinking. We went to beer hall once and I just kept the stein in front of me while Dan drank my beer. But today, we were in a more intimate setting at my cousins house and had to explain why I wasn't drinking. So, what worked out really well for me is that Lent just started so I told everyone I have it up for lent. I wasn't going to bring it up if none else did, but it was noticed. I think at least most people bought it. It should work out well because I will share the news before lent is over :)

Today's Craving (week 7)

Sweet Hawaiian crunchy potato chips and hot sauce.

6 weeks

Maternity Leave
Today I looked up the maternity plan that my company offers. Like most places, it's pretty crap. However, there was a glimmer of hope for a minute. I googled the maternity plan on the intranet and found a Word doc that said a lot of amazing things - I got paid for 6 weeks off at 100% and then a portion of my salary for up to 33 weeks after!! And then my balloon and I realized that the plan I was reading was only for Europeans :( :(

When I found the US plan they literally considered pregnancy an illness - AN ILLNESS! So, I'm only covered under short-term disability - which mean I will be covered at about 80% for 6 weeks and then with a doctors note I could stay out longer but w/out pay. So, If I work hard to provide for myself and my family I get punished and sent back to work hard - but if I was lazy and an underachiever  I could have a shit-tone of kids and the government would send me a check every week to help me out. It makes a lot of sense America...a lot of sense.......

Prenatals
I started taking prenatals this week. My midwife wanted me to take liquid vitamins but CVS didn't have any. So, I bought a normal pill for now to at least get me started. I've only taken two, but I haven't noticed any bad taste or nausea.

Health Checkup
On Tuesday I had my first meeting with my midwife. Overall, it went very well - it lasted about 2 hours! We mostly chatted, but she did my initial vitals, checked my urine, and took some blood. She was supposed to call me back yesterday with my blood result but I haven't heard back yet. This is very very unlike her, but I'm just assuming something came up with her family or another momma. I'm sure there's really nothing to tell, so I'm not worried.

No Symptoms
I have heard that if I haven't experienced any pregnancy symptoms yet, it will most likely start this week. However, I really couldn't say that I have any yet! I do have some minor symptoms (tired and cramping) but if I wasn't specifically looking for it I probably wouldn't think much of it.

Fun
The fun stuff really hasn't started yet. I'm still focusing on getting the house ready (not the nursery) thinking about my job, doing some financial planning, etc. I'm debating getting professional pregnancy photos done, but I'm not sure if it would be worth the cost. I know from wedding photography, you really get what you pay for. I mean, what would I really do with these photos other than post a few on facebook and hope I get some nice comments on them....so I am I really paying for an ego boost? Maybe, at 7/8 months pregnant I'll need that.

Birth Plan

It was this blog that inspired me to go the route of an out-of-hospital birth. At the time we didn't plan on getting pregnant but I knew if I ever changed my mind, that would be the way I wanted to go.

I didn't waste anytime looking up midwives and birthing centers. (I was pleasantly surprised at the options available for out of hospital births in the area.) I wanted to make sure I was getting prenatal care as soon as possible. the process to find one was surprisingly easy. A local birthing center had a list of midwives on their website. I started out by looking at all of them that had websites, then I emailed three of those, and only two got back to me.

The first person we interviewed as LaNette. She was amazing - friendly, warm, experienced, etc...
Dan and I were so convinced that we wanted her I wanted to cancel my appointment with the other midwife. But then again, we thought - LaNette is too good, too good to be true, so let's meet the other woman.

Well, the other woman was named Jan. She was also great, as far as being qualified. However, it stopped there. She didn't seem warm or that caring, she felt more like a doctor - disconnected. We new right away that LaNette was the best.

Just to reassure ourselves again I asked LaNette for some references. I only had to talk to the first one and I again knew she was the best. This woman is a "repeat customer" and couldn't stop talking for 1/2 hour on how great LaNette is and her referring doctor.

So, that next morning I booked LaNette and I have my first meeting with her on tuesday :)

I haven't even paid her the deposit yet and he's already been helpful. This morning I had to text her with an "emergency" question about the massage and reflexology appointment I had that morning. She got back to me right away!

So, long story short - this is the woman that will help deliver our healthy baby :)

5 1/2 weeks

Symptoms:
This week has been pretty good. I feel good, the cramping is far less and my hunger is pretty much back to normal. the only thing is i'm pretty tired this week. I can't really say it's fatigue, but I just feel like going to bed earlier. Last night I went to bed at 8:30!!

I continue to be a little extra emotional. I feel like trying when I think about being a mom, or that moment when the baby is born.

Sharing the News:
So, I told my parent's the very first day but I've also recently told Melissa. It's  really great to have such a close friend to talk to who is not only a new mom but has gone through an out-of-hospital birth. She's only know for a few days and has already been a big help!

Well, we had planned to tell Dan's parents this weekend, but Raemi has been in the hospital all week and Sarah just had her baby about 2 days ago. So, we are holding off until that excitement dies down a bit.

Random:
Even though i'm still very early in the pregnancy, i'm almost 1/2 way through the first trimester :)

I'm starting to purge things around the house again and Dan is trying to finish up some projects. I'd really like to finish nesting in the first trimester so as we get closer we can put more and more focus on the baby :)

Today's Craving (week 4)

 Milkshakes, Milkshakes, Milkshakes!

4 weeks

I'm currently 4 weeks along and really haven't been experiencing any typical early pregnancy symptoms.

• No nausea
• Breasts are only minutely sensitive
• No smell sensitivity
• I'm actually losing waiting (down 3lbs from my before-we-found-out-weight)
• I am a little light-headed occasionally
• I'm craving chocolate milkshakes - but not too crazy
• There has been however, a fair amount of cramping
• I am the opposite of tired (except for last night), I'm not tired in the evening and I wake up early in the morning!

TTC

We agreed we wouldn't go full speed ahead with trying to conceive. We would take it easy, slow, and just let things happen when they may. However, I didn't want to waste time as I was not getting any younger. I spent about 3 months tracking my ovulation date with some cheap ovulation strips and using an iphone app.

Come Jan, Dan was ready to try. Now, the average, healthy couple takes about 6 months to conceive - which I think is about 70%-80% of most couples. Well, we tried once and I got pregnant! There is only about a 25%-30% change of that happening...and in generally maybe only a 25% or less chance of getting pregnant in any given month!

I was excited and Dan was shocked. I bought a bunch of Dollar Tree pregnancy tests and used one on the first day of my missed period and it was negative....I was getting anncy, so on the 3rd day of my missed period, I bought one of those expensive sensitive grocery store ones (I had a $2 off coupon) and..bamb! it worked. Two very clear lines :)

I tried to think of a cute idea on how to tell Dan I was pregnant. I didn't spend that much time on it b/c I thought I would have more time to think about it :) Just incase...I ended up buying a onsie ahead of time. I had this grand idea of writing a message on it and having Mr. T deliver it. What really happened was that I wrote on the onsie, woke Dan up, threw it at him and he said, I'm too sleepy I can't see. So, yeah it didn't work out quite as I had pictured :)

imgur

The Begining

For the longest time (my entire life) I've always said I never wanted to have kids and I never wanted to get married. Well, I ended up getting married and found a husband that also didn't want to have kids (it was a good thing to agree on!).

I was completely turned off to the idea of having kids; I just couldn't understand the appeal. But then, slowly over the years things started to change. It got to the point where I had to plan a baby shower for my cousin and ended up researching and looking through all kinds of baby stuff. I realized, "Hey, I'm not repulsed by this stuff anymore!?" Fast forward a few months when we went to Oktoberfest...I got completely wasted and started crying telling Dan that I wanted kids and we should try that night. He of course was completely take back and needed a few months (at least) to wrap his head around the idea. So, we spent about the next 4 months discussing having a baby.